I met up with my friend today who I have known since I was 10. We are starting to feel a bit old and past it and find ourselves looking at older women with bodies bent over zimmerframes/ walking sticks/ shopping trolleys with dogs in and musing what we will be like when we are still meeting up for tea dosed up on drugs, equipped with tena ladies and commenting on the length of skirts on girls. I recalled the film Ladies in Lavender and the sad realisation that Judi Dench’s character experienced when she realised she will never have the passion and pleasure experienced with young love, nor have the capabilities to woo a man of a certain age. How awful must it be when men just look straight through you.
I had a phone call from the guy I had a crush on during my cycle training today and blushed while I was talking to him. I also had my husband’s twenty something ex employee doing some hard work in the front garden and I came over all bashful when I asked if he took sugar and he said he was ‘sweet enough’. Its pathetic but now I am too old for schoolgirl crushes, I want to rekindle that feeling.
But I am on the slippery slope to Judi Denchdom and ‘growing old gracefully’.
But as I once saw written on the back of a motorhome, I believe in ‘adventure before dementia’.
This blog is for Unicef.
Thanks for reading.
If there is someone ‘up there’ (as in amongst the clouds….not, the, um, other type), I am convinced they are setting up some kind of temptation challenge this week.
Thankfully the cycle course has finished so I can stop trying to resist the temptation to be an out and out flirt with the hot instructor (although I will have to see him again when he comes to observe one of my sessions……..as if I need more distraction).
My husband asks me to collect the guy working for him as he is out for the day and the guy doesnt drive. So, I show up and ask the guys from the neighbouring unit where he is. “He is log-splitting over there”. So I follow the track up to where they are pointing and as I turn to the woodshed the music starts up…..you know from the Diet Coke break. He is topless, check, toned, check, tanned, check, good-looking check and the cherry on top – swinging an axe in the Autumn sunshine.
I tried not to stare. But when he saw me I think I blushed, I also felt the desire to avert my gaze as I didnt trust myself not to stare for longer than was polite.
As he gathered his belongings and walked back to the car with the axe on his shoulder, I kept wondering whether it was me or the environment I suddenly find myself in where all these fit men have come out of the woodwork. But its not a good thing to happen because it reminds me of when I was 17 but Im not 17, Im more like Judi Dench in Ladies in Lavender.
This blog is for Unicef. Thanks for reading.