Time with the family is often fraught over the holidays because my husband and I are like our 2 Jack Russels. Some times we are quite happy to share a bed together, other times we want to rip each other’s throats out. We do actually growl at each other in frustration over disagreements.
We disagree a lot. Disagreements often begin as follows, hubby has a certain way of thinking about something. I have an alternative approach. Hubby doesn’t do alternative approaches, it is his way or the highway. If you try and suggest a different way he discounts it immediately without listening to what you have to say. In the majority of cases if it is not similar to his opinion then he is not interested. There are two ways of dealing with this mentality, accept or fight. On the whole I fight and eventually get my voice heard.
Unfortunately for my daughter, she is having to figure out how to work with her Dad when he will not listen to her opinion. Gone are the days when she w’s a toddler and all my husband had o donnas say ‘no’. Now she has her own voice, independent thinking and views that are often contrary to her Dad’s. So very often I am caught as the piggy in the middle, trying to encourage my hubby to listen p his daughter more and encourage my daughter to reason with her Dad better by recognising what he is asking her to do, showing that she respects him but at the same time voicing her opinion. My husband just starts shouting if he feels he isn’t being heard so this ‘UN peacekeeping’ process can be quote exhausting.
But I am hoping that my daughter is observing that behaviour like this is not to be perpetuated through submission. My Mum calls me confrontational but she is in a situation where my stepdad only has to say jump and she says ‘how high’.
Things need to move on.
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Thanks for reading.