It is hard to be English. First is the requirement to be subtle and satirical. This is why I ‘broke free’ from my Britishness shackles in Florida and immersed myself in the carefree approach to gas guzzling over-sized 4×4 motoring without a ‘tut-tut’ in sight or ear-shot. I also enjoyed being able to park everywhere and unashamedly guzzle pancakes and gush over Minnie Mouse without anyone sneering at me. I did all this while dosing up on vitamin E from the sunshine and buzzing from all the megawatt customer service smiles I received everywhere I went. So when I returned to the wet, grey and miserable looking UK I have to confess I momentarily felt like jumping off a bridge. Then I slipped back into being British, which is essentially our coping mechanism for living in predominantly shit weather with not much to look forward to apart from fish and chips on Fridays and something good on the telly, like Mary Berry’s cooking shower Kirstie Allsopp, to remind you how the ‘better half’ live. If only we all lived like those characters in the Working Title films assisted by computer graphics to make the winter seem cosy, the summer seem..well sunny and the budget to live in a period home and drive a mini or an Audi.
But joking aside, thankfully I live in a western country that is stable and not likely to experience an uprising anytime soon, well not since the riots in London of 2011 anyway……I still don’t know what that was all about. Doubt that anyone who shops in Waitrose had anything to do with it though, David Cameron would testify to that. Apparently he believes Waitrose attracts people who use more than monosyllables to communicate and are unlikely to holler like fish wives at their children, because they wouldn’t dream of asking the nanny to bring the children shopping too.
Moving on from middle-class bashing, Amnesty International deal with crimes against humanity world-wide and I like to support their petitions. The recent petition is for Obama to support the UN in intervening to prevent the religiously motivated massacre in central Africa during which women have seen their children killed in front of them just for being in the wrong religion. Sign the petition here.
This blog is for UNICEF – find out more here.
Thanks for reading.