Good vibrations

A pound in the pot for last night’s missed blog to Unicef. Hubby and I went out for the evening on a rare treat without the children. I had lots of stuff to blog about but just got back too late, so here goes…..

What a bizarre day! After baby boy screaming the place down in the hairdressers, somehow Lilly, his hairdresser managed to give him a good cut even though he kept trying to put his fingers in-between the scissors despite my best efforts to distract him. I then resorted to restraining him to prevent injury. On my way home I see my neighbour outside the toddler group carrying a load of long boxes under her arm. I pull over to ask her about my husband getting more firewood for her and as soon as I wind the window down she says, “do you want to buy  vibrator for 50 pounds?” ..”come again” I ask her baffled (excuse the pun) to which she responds that they can be purchased in blue, black or red! She then goes on to explain that a mum at the toddler group was selling a load of them on the cheap as her tenant had fallen behind on her rent (she was running an online sex toy company) and used some of her stock to pay back the rent.

Although no-one believed me, I purchased one for a friend (not for myself). I definitely wouldn’t be able to use it anyway as I later found out that day from my doctor that the reason why I was continuing to have periods and mood swings was because my mirena coil had dropped. I was being examined by a trainee doctor who was being overseen by the doctor who installed the coil n the first place. When they came to examine me the trainee doctor was surprised that I had got into the right position for examination before she had asked me to. I explained that after 2 children I was well rehearsed. They cranked my cervix open like  a car on a jack (much to the bemusement of my baby boy who was being entertained by one of he doctors ). The trainee doctor said she thought it didn’t look right (to which my instant thought was the coil or my cervix?). I then had both doctors peering between my legs tutting about the state of affairs in there. The experienced doctor then adjusted her vision from my fanny to me face and said, “I know you are in a rather compromising position, but when was the last time you had sexual intercourse”? It turns out that I have been having unprotected sex and that in addition to having the coil removed, I will have to take a  pregnancy test before they fit anther one “just in case”. Apparently it is unusual for the coil to drop and that it happens at the surgery about once a year.

I am slightly concerned as according to my mother I “got through the coil” when I was conceived so I might be part of a family trend…..

I am blogging every day to raise money for Unicef. Check out the fundraising page here – please donate if you can.

Thanks for reading.


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