My husband is pretending to hit my head on the window – in a joking manner of course – don’t go calling the police. It is because he is frustrated that on my day off from work, he likes to know what I have been doing all day, as if looking after a toddler is not enough to fill my time. I refuse to tell him because I will not fall into the ‘dutiful wife reporting to her master category’ – I have two letters for that, FO.
I am unfortunately not the only woman who has this problem. If you stay at home with your children, you must be twiddling your thumbs and dodging work. It’s funny though that when you suggest to caveman that he do the ‘daddy day care’ and that you go out and earn the crust – he pales in horror at the thought.
Also, like many women out there, I am a ‘shrink to fit’. On paper I have more qualifications than my husband and I could probably earn more than him. However that is not to discredit him as I am glad that he is the breadwinner so that I can enjoy the early years, I wouldn’t have it any other way. It just grinds on me when he also inclines towards expecting me to be a little subservient, like I am answerable to him somehow because I am not working full-time.
This behaviour stems from his upbringing as his Dad was the breadwinner and his Mum the housewife. So I am hoping that my son and daughter witness a Mum and Dad that are more on an equal footing to move away from that very dated old-fashioned view. However, I think the only thing they are witnessing is this never-ending power struggle. I like to think this will alter once I am working full-time when my son starts school but somehow I just think I will be a lot busier…..
I was about to type that I am luckier than some women though, as ‘my husband does help around the house’ but why should that be extraordinary? As a Mum it is my duty to ensure my son and daughter both help out around the house equally and recognise that there is no such thing as ‘women’s work’.
When shopping for shin pads for her daughter, my friend noticed that on the Sport Direct website they had the sizes described as ‘Boys Junior’ and ‘Boys infant’. There was no size for ‘girls’. That’s a pretty strong assumption to make. The views of women in society have stalled and in fact may be going backwards rather than forwards. Maybe in 10 years time I will be wearing empire line dresses, occupying my time with embroidery and powdering my heaving bosom as I ponder over a potential husband for my daughter.
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Thanks for reading.