My Stepdad and his family are a bit of a closed shop. They are the type of family that like to sit all together at a wedding and don’t attempt to mix with anyone else. They are a bit like the Mafia in that respect. I gave up on them long ago but my Mum has had to stick it out for my Stepdad’s sake. My Mum does have to work hard to tolerate them as for the past 10 years that she has been married to my Stepdad they have made her feel like an outsider, like a visitor and not one of them. To make her feel even more of an outsider, the stepbrothers have asked her to pay her own bill towards the luxury cottage break planned for my Stepdad’s 70th birthday. My Mum is indispensable for this treat to be a success as my Stepdad would not enjoy it without her, yet they are expecting her to pay for it with no consultation on alternatives. When my Mum approached my Stepdad about what his sons had asked her to do he shrugged his shoulders and expected her to just go along with it. What a complete tosser.
Meanwhile, on my husband’s side of the family tension mounts as thoughts turn to the 1st birthday celebrations of my nephew who was born on the same day as my husband. My husband has categorically stated that in no way will he share his birthday celebrations with his nephew (this may seem unreasonable but his eldest sister dominated his childhood and always got preferential treatment by his olds, for her to have a child on his birthday is the final nail in the coffin of their relationship).
The one thing that strikes me about both these situations is the lack of thought and care towards the feelings of another family member. In Mum’s case she is not even considered as family, in my husband’s case, the resentment built up over years tolerating his sister and his parents’ submissive reaction to his sister has hit boiling point, with our nephew’s birthday as the catalyst.
Time to batten down the hatches!
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Thanks for reading.