“Oi deaf boy” is an endearing term I use for my old man who I have lived with for 15 years. He is not completely deaf (apparently there is some level of hearing in his left ear but I have yet to find it). After he takes his hearing aid out a bomb could go off and he wouldn’t hear it.
I met him on an night out with the girls after finishing my A Levels. It was love at first sight (well physical attraction at first – the love bit followed later) and while we were talking my friend pointed out to me that he had a hearing aid. “So what” I said shrugging my shoulders. You would have thought she was talking about leprosy in the way she reacted. Needless to say she is no longer my friend – not because of that but just a cumulation of incidents that led me to conclude “you are actually not a very nice person – goodbye”.
As it so happens my hearing is slightly wonky too and I could wear a hearing aid if I wanted (my husband technically should be wearing 2 but he only wears one in the ear that is completely deaf). Before he met me he had been considering attending a ‘deaf club’ to meet hard of hearing friends but he didnt get that far when he met me in a nightclub. You don’t need good hearing in a nightclub anyway as most people use a form of sign language to communicate.
There are positives and negatives to being hard of hearing.
– the world is in mute – I hadn’t realised how muted my world was until I started to wear a digital hearing aid and HATED it. When I turned up at the hospital for a fitting the lady put it in my ear and said, “right I am about to turn it on now” she then put her piece of paper on the table and I jumped a mile – it was so LOUD. She laughed and said I might want to keep it out on my way back through the hospital otherwise I will be a nervous wreck by the time I get to the car. She then suggested I start wearing it only at home on it’s most muted setting until I acclimatise to it. I did as she said and gradually got used to it but I found it exhausting to wear it because everywhere was so loud. So I started to take it out every now and then – which became a permanent habit and now I don’t even know where it is. Both our children have excellent hearing and I worry that we have our telly on too loud and the radio on too loud because we can’t hear it as well as them.
– If I need to sleep and its noisy (either because next door are having an argument or hubby has the TV on loud) I just turn over so that my better ear is squashed on the pillow and then …silence – its bliss
– Selective hearing – I can’t be the only person out there who doesn’t ‘pretend’ not to hear people when it is convenient (sorry I know thats naughty)
– I enjoy making my hubby’s aid whistle by covering it – it reminds me of when I used to hug my gran and I squeezed her so tight she would say “oops your making my hearing aid whistle again” and I used to squeeze her even tighter and it would make her giggle. When she died I asked if I could keep her hearing aid (slightly werid request I know) but sadly the NHS needed it back.
I think that’s it – I will list the negatives tomorrow.
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