Carry on bloomin camping

The old man and I are in a feud over camping. The truth is I like camping but only during the day. Come night-time I’m off to the hotel to retreat to warmth, sumptuous beds, light and the luxury of being able to pop to the loo without braving sub-zero temperatures and unzipping a zillion zips every time.

This year we had a break from camping as little one was very little – thank fuck we did as it would have been even more interesting to be up for 2 consecutive nights in a tent with baby teething issues – bad enough in a 4 bedroomed French gite. Last year we camped while I was pregnant and the frequent trips to the loo were beyond a joke – never  mind the added awkwardness of stretching my sleeping bag over my bump. So frequent were these toilet trips that I got to know the camp-site at night quite well. On our final night on the umpteenth trip from the loo, I was just unzipping the tent when I felt a presence behind me, which, as I turned, became a tall silhouette of a man. I freaked and let out a bloodcurdling scream that must have woken up the entire camp-site – the man jumped too then said “shhhh its me silly” (my husband). I have discovered he is quite scary if you come across him at night when you least expect it. I was glad it was our last night as I was soooo embarrassed.

I also remember some very very heated arguments over keeping the gas cooker outside the tent (excuse the pun). Recently in Britain there has been an increase in deaths by carbon monoxide and gas poisoning after campers left their barbecue or cooker in the tent over-night. By the morning they were dead. I did not want us to suffer a similar fate, which was why I was adamant that the cooker stayed outside the tent over-night – my stubborn husband thought I was over-reacting and refused – a tussle over the cooker ensued – again it must have been very entertaining for fellow campers. In fact camping causes many arguments – you only have to observe couples and families trying to assemble their tents in the first place.

So that is a summary of my gripes about camping – I would like to try out a slightly more lux alternative… trailer tents are an option but not convinced being a few more inches off the ground is any better? Your views as ever are welcome….

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Thanks for reading.


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