Will a 3 year old enjoy Olympic beach volleyball? Toffs and common-sense or lack of it

A friend of mine is a nanny for wealthy families – the kind that live their lives according to a checklist….

Country house – check
labrador – check
4 x 4 car – check
aga – check
more than one child – check
nanny to look after children when realise harder to look after than labrador – check
nanny to also walk labrador as well as children because that is also too difficult – check

sad isn’t it? One such family has decided to take their 3 year old to watch the beach volleyball and leave their 2 year old with my friend. My friend is fully expecting a call with a demand to collect the child from the volleyball once mother realises that beach volleyball can only entertain a 3 year old for 5 mins max. This mother never says please or thank you just makes demands. Similar to English families in the Victorian times who used hired help for everything, which is also true of many white South African families today.

Below: The made in Chelsea lot – take-away their inherited wealth and they would be in the queue for JSA rather than a top London club. This lot just can’t think for themselves like most British ‘old money’

Another one of her families is classed as ‘old money’. People that have been brought up in an environment where everything is done for  them and this lifestyle  has existed since great great great great great etc etc grandfather first made his money from slaves in the sugar plantations. The result is that the descendants in 2012 do not have an ounce of common sense between them. This particular mother and father cannot work out parenting at all despite the fact that their child is one of the easiest children to look after that my friend has ever encountered in her 20 years of being a nanny. Since a baby the child has had little or no stimulation at home. Therefore, although bright, he has emotionally and socially developed at a very slow rate compared to other children his age. If this family weren’t living off inheritance they would be on benefits and social services would be helping them with parenting. This is one case that proves money does not buy a good childhood and wealth does not equal success when it comes to parenting – which in my view is failure.

Anyway I will let you know how the beach volley ball went down with the kid tomorrow…

BTW – am sooo pleased that GBR got eventing silver – shame about Mary King and Tina Cook missing out on individual medals. Thought it was quite harsh of Princess Anne not to clap when Zara finished her first round on 8 faults…

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What did I say about Twitter?

News that Tom Daley, our British diving hopeful, received sick taunts on Twitter after missing out on the medals is further proof that Twitter is pointless tittle tattle. It gives a public forum to idiots.

I love the Olympics and I love eventing and I am sooo excited that Team GBR are in a medal position prior to the final phase of the showjumping – great stuff. BBC coverage was a bit patchy though. Just when things were starting to hot up in Greenwich park with Team GBR versus the world BBC decide to switch to Chinese gymnastics. So switched back to beeb 1 only to find the exact same thing – why show Chinese gymnastics on both channels simultaneously?? The cross country course looked very challenging both to ride and film particularly beacuse of the low-hanging trees everywhere with soome riders literally having to duck under branches. They could have done a quick tidy up before hand – they arfe meant to jump not duck… the beeb cameraman seemed to find it challenging too as they hunted for a horse while zooming up on the leaves of a London Plane tree.

So desperate was I to catch equestrianism on mainstream TV (minority sports that don’t fall in the football/ cricket/ rugby category are rare on freeview) that I carried my baby (complete with his high chair) into the front room so as not to miss a second. Also deprived my daughter of her daily dose of CBBC for the pleasure of watching top level eventing – didn’t feel guilty at all…..

Questions that randomly popped into my head today were:

1) What made a person cross a Rottweiler with a Staffie and then sell the resulting puppy to a guy who is a snadwich short of a picnic and has an aversion to leads?

2) Why is it that no matter how little you eat and how much you try to exercise, the female butt still continues to jiggle and sag??

A short one tonight but hopefully sweet – if you like please give £1 or $1 to Unicef – the whole reason why I am blogging daily. Sorry to be a party pooper but just think what  the £30 million spent on the opening ceremony would have done if used instead to help  children struggling in the refugee camps of Africa. Did David B ask David C that? I don’t think so..


Facebook and Twitter is a pile of poo

Just watching Becky Adlington winning a  bronze medal and surprised to see BBC commentators talking about Becky’s fellow athletes congratulating her on Twitter. Becky herself tweeted this morning how nervous she was. How do they get time to even get on the computer let alone tweet?

I’ve got images of them typing as they complete a length of the pool in training – don’t be such a dinosaur Tom – they tweet on their phone these days….. anyway it got me to thinking how people express nerves and anxiety. I think I would bottle up and stay the hell away from twitter.

I can’t stand Facebook and Twitter and not because I am anti-social because I like blogging but only because I am doing it for a cause – otherwise I wouldn’t bother.

Actually I HATE Facebook. Its a pile of crap. Lets be honest most people don’t know their 250 ‘friends’ or whatever obscene number they clock up to very well. These friends are typically brief encounters in a bar rather than deep and meaningful friendships. Its all a bit ‘look at me and my wonderful friends, family, car, dog, fish, pussy’ or whatever. Their pages resemble a cheesy unedited Hello article not real life.

Most of us are nosey to varying degrees and FB really scratches that itch to passively delve into people’s lives without the bother of having to visit them, phone them or even interact with them at all for months on end. The pages themselves aren’t a true reflection of a person’s life – more like an advert that the ASA would criticise if they analysed it for inaccuracy. In short, Peacocks suit FB – all show no go.

I think the people who aren’t on FB are probably far more interesting individuals – before you ask I have discontinued my FB page because it irritated the hell out of me.

Actually an honest FB page would be far more entertaining – pictures of families arguing, unflattering portraits etc etc.

FB marketing has gone mad. Has anyone checked out the FB page for pasta sauce? What is the point? Marketing departments seem to think they have to have an FB page regardless of what objective it would achieve. I used to be one of those people.

There is no point to FB and I hope that one by one an anti-FB revolution will start as people turn their backs on the online portal for people peacocks…….oh, and the guy who set it up is a total twat.


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Where’s the cheesy grin Queenie?

First of all my apologies… Have only just started and have already let one day drop – pound in the pot to Unicef from me. I was up way past midnight watching the Olympic opening ceremony and in hindsight should have been typing this post as I was watching but I didn’t want to miss a second of it – not even to glance at the computer screen – it was bloody brilliant. I was sceptical as to what it would be like – images of that nincampoop Boris muttering down a microphone and waving a flag rather dodgily but Danny Boyle did us proud.

I do think that Queenie could have tried harder to smile – it almost looked as if she had just had a domestic with Prince Phil and was in a sulk – she didn’t even attempt to turn the corners of her mouth upwards let alone switch on the cheesy grin – I don’t think we get our value for money as taxpayers with that performance. however I was very impresses that she jumped out of the helicopter with Daniel Craig. maybe if she really had done it the thrill she would have done even more than smile – maybe even a whoop!

In a while I will update this with a real blooper during the BBC coverage last night – did anyone spot some interesting subtitles during commentary of the women’s rowing??

9.12 pm – yes as I was saying in the commentary of the woman’s rowing I had subtitles on because my hearing isn’t all that great when I found myself reading ‘the girls were really going for that sex offender’ !! Um… did you mean silver medal maybe? I hope so. Anyway it gave us hard of hearing and deaf people a chuckle….or the wrong end of the stick…


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Do the Kardashians really represent all that is wrong with the world?

I’m typing this while watching the Kardashians. The sisters are having an argument over a Chanel bag. The dad is irate over his 11 year old wearing make-up emulating her overly done sisters. I don’t really know why I am watching this but like a lot of people I am strangely drawn to it. Part of me is thinking ‘are these people for real?’ and part of me enjoys the escapism of observing people whose lives are dominated by  trivial issues. But then I thought about how many times I look in the mirror every day and how long I think about what I am going to wear in the morning – which is not an enjoyable process but I still care what I look like. Why? is it for me or for my husband…or my friends. Or worse….other mothers at the school bus stop.

Apparently a large percentage of mothers manage to squeeze some time into the regular morning mayhem to stick on some slap. Why? Are we all a bunch of secret lesbians why do we need to be physically appealing to the same sex? A Mum once said to me that it was important to her that she was not the fattest mum in school and not the oldest. I have so far resisted the temptation to colour my hair but maybe I might change my mind when I resemble a badger or a witch – not sure which is worst. My daughter’s school mascot is a badger……

Maslow’s (I think its Maslow) hierarchy of needs shows that I am doing alright, like the Kardashians because my concerns have gone beyond feeling safe, nourished and under shelter. I feel guilty about that. Guilt is good though because it means celebrities like the Kardashians can pay-off guilt with charity bashes – charities benefit a lot from Western guilt. They have to look good at these bashes though…so does attending these bashes satisfy their conscience or boost their profile? A bit of both. Don’t forget the puppy dog eye appeals  to get the public digging deep. I think the worst was Victoria Beckham watching an Indian girl picking through rubbish for items to sell – as she did her piece to camera with the girl in the background asking us to part with her cash I noted that she looked good in her designer outfit.

The only people who don’t seem to feel guilt at success and personal wealth are (my apologies for this sweeping generalisation) ……bankers. Hislop presented a programme recounting the philanthropic actions of the Victorians – with the families behind some of the big banks doing some amazing long-term life-changing actions that are still having a positive effect on society today. Not sure our current crop of bankers will leave the same legacy. When will they start to share their wealth and put back some good in the world? I think Channel Four’s the Bank of Dave has the right idea – bring back community banking, encourage local business growth to boost the local economy, prospects and employment; make a modest profit and donate to local charities. Go Dave….boo Kim.

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